I Got Toys!

I finally got my hands on all of the Wave 1 toys that I’ve wanted for so long! I got all of them at Toys R Us except the T. rex, which I found at Kmart; if you live near one, you might want to check it out, I also found some Basher-Biters and Brawlasaurs there. Let’s begin with a little toy review from probably the last person in the fandom to get her hands on these things!



The first one I got was Ankylosaurus, my favorite herbivore since I was a kid and now one of the centerpieces of my collection. It has a lovely sculpt, the face isn’t misshapen like I thought it was and the Dino Damage wound is the least conspicuous in the whole line (and the screw holes are the least conspicuous as well). It’s also very playable, having a neck that sticks out when you move its leg and a swinging tail. I’m still deciding what to name this one; I feel the strange and inexplicable urge to nickname it Ham.


Next is the Stegoceratops which, as I’ve said before, has the best sculpt and paint job in the line. If you’re buying for quality, you’ve decided to accept a very possible movie-involved reality like I have or just want a nice herbivore in a brand where they’re fairly rare, this is a must-buy. It sticks its neck out as well, much like an iguana. I’ve named mine Stegoclaireatops for obvious reasons.





Next I got the I. rex and gyrosphere set. If you want an I. rex but don’t want to pony up $35 for a Bad Boy, this is for you. Of course, Bad Boy is still far superior, but this isn’t a bad alternative at all. Of course there are design flaws, like the screw holes and the extremely annoying Dino Damage slider (seriously, that thing gives a new meaning to ‘on a hair-trigger’) but it also looks great overall and has a very nice head sculpt. It might be the poor man’s I. rex, but it’s still a pretty great toy.

It came with a Gyrosphere and a very tiny ACU:



The ACU is, well, expendable (more on that later) but the Gyrosphere is great. It looks film-accurate and it’s sized pretty well with the larger figures and Anky, so you can reenact the Gyrosphere attack scene easily. And my mom is fond of it, so it can’t be too bad.


From Kmart today, I got the Chomping T. rex! Honestly, I have to say that this doesn’t deserve all of the flak that I and others have given it. It’s actually a pretty decent toy– not anywhere near Kenner level, but good enough on its own. The body is nicely colored and detailed, and the much-bemoaned head sculpt isn’t so bad up close:


If for no other reason than as a placeholder until the Mega Strike rex comes out this fall, I’d recommend getting this one. It’ll look nice and menacing on your desk or as a prop in your to-scale Jurassic Park River Adventure model. I thought it was appropriate to name this one Sue.


Finally, I got the Blue raptor growler! Out of all the toys, this one is my favorite. The sculpt and paint job are phenomenal– I’d even commit the heresy of comparing it to a Kenner raptor– and the sound effects and lunging-claw attack are very cool. The only problem that I have with it is that it can’t seem to stand up on its own for too long. If you get the balance juuuust right it might stay upright for you for a bit, but a stiff breeze will knock it right down. But don’t let that discourage you– it’s an otherwise great toy. Here’s the best I could do, with my incredibly shaky camera hand, of capturing her light-up wound:



Here’s a close-up of the new brand-name leg tattoos, a squarish JW that all the dinosaurs have in some color or another. They were very enthusiastic about their ink, and demonstrated the tattoos’ significance by telling me they cared about my soul and offering me free copies of The Watchtower.

But what are toys for if not for playing? I had some fun with mine for sure. I don’t know why, especially since I normally take huge care when handling any of my JP stuff, but I felt that this ACU guy needed to be shown his place, possibly because he dared to be the sort of human who’d shoot at a dinosaur without provocation. I needed to take him down a peg. He needed to be destroyed.





Even my truly horrible, years-old attempt at a Mosasaur statue hesitated before accepting him as prey.


Meanwhile, I. rex (name TBD; I’d welcome suggestions, has anyone got ideas? I’m going for something death-metal yet feminine here) and Stegoclaireatops were having a very productive meeting of their support group when Sue came in and crashed it, thinking it was a party. T. rexes do have a terrible habit of crashing into buildings without prior warning.


Immediately after I took these, Ian began requesting that everyone call him either “Malcolm the Dinosaur Slayer” or “Ian the Great, Beast-Tamer”. Fearing the power of the guy who before this called himself “Chaos King”, the dinosaurs complied.




There was a family reunion, and the whole gang got back together!


It was, however, not without disputes. Tensions mounted. I fear things may come to blows sometime soon.


But everything turned out okay in the end. Here is a dark but mostly all-encompassing (there’s a vehicle and two hatchlings missing) picture of my collection, solely for bragging reasons:


Just because I felt like it, I put on my Ellie cosplay and took a couple of shots with Sue. Luckily I live right across the street from some very Nublar-like woods; I have a whole cosplay album with Ellie, Ian and Alan and maybe sometime I’ll post it here.

Don’t judge too hard, I didn’t have enough daylight left for a decent makeup job.



That’s it, and as you can see I’m very happy that I finally got my dinos! If any of you guys have gotten yours yet, please feel free to put them in ridiculous situations and send me pictures, there’s no end to the possible hilarity! Especially if you have a similar need to abuse the ACUs. And speaking of cosplay, I’d better not be the only one in the fandom going to the midnight premiere in cosplay. I’ll probably end up going as Malcolm; I’d love to see some kindred spirits and I’ll probably keel over from happiness if I see an Ellie there with me. So if you’ve got a similar plan, send your pictures so at the least I can gush over them and at the most I can feature you in a cosplay post! We’ve got a huge opportunity here and I for one plan to explain chaos theory to at least six people that night. Let’s not just see this movie. Let’s freakin’ storm it.


15 thoughts on “I Got Toys!

  1. Awesome review. Maybe i’ll get around on reviewing these things in…IDK…five months or so? I’m currently working on the Lost World toys post. Then I’ve got the JP3 toys to worry about.
    And yes, the exact same thing came to mind when I saw the JW logos on the toys. It makes me smile every time.
    Name suggestion for your I. rex? Hmmm, how about Natasha?
    Awesome cosplay BTW. I’m not sure who I would cosplay as. Being Hispanic, I guess I can go as the guy who gets eaten be the Indominus.


    1. Natasha sounds greatI It brings Boris and Natasha to mind, and I. rex does seem like she’d enjoy destroying things and organized crime.

      Thanks, I’m glad you like my cosplay! I will personally beat up anyone who tells someone else that they can’t cosplay a character right because of their race– you do you, I’m sure you’d look great as anyone. But if you wanna do a Hispanic character, hey, there’s always Jophery and Carter.


    1. You make cosplay videos?! That’s so awesome!! I love meeting other cosplayers! I’ll make sure to watch your videos. And I have nothing against the ACUs! Just their terrible figures. I’m sure you’re cool guys.


  2. After seeing reviews of them on Youtube, I kinda wanna get the Pteranodon and Dimorphodon.
    I know the Pteranodon at least is wicked ugly, but the method of playing with her is actually pretty creative (you just squeeze her feet and her wings start flapping; it makes it easier to pretend like she’s flying because you need to hold onto the back of her body to make her flap her wings). The Dimorphodon is less ugly and honestly I think I’d like to have a Dimorphodon toy (it’s nice to see such an underrated pterosaur get some recognition).
    Also, nice Ellie cosplay!


    1. Thank you so much! The Dimorphodon is actually a really lovely figure and I’m starting to regret not getting it. I’d definitely recommend getting it. And the Pteranodon would be perfect if it weren’t for the teeth! That’s kind of a fatal flaw for me, but if it isn’t for you, more power to you.


      1. Oh, I definitely don’t like the teeth on the Pteranodon (Pteranodon’s my favorite animal, so I get a bit more protective of it than other animals) but the toy still seems better than I initially expected, so I might be able to ignore that this time!


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