Random News: Shining and Unattainable Merchandise Edition

I’m terribly sorry for the break in posting, everyone. I moved to a new house over the past week or so. I’m setting up a mostly JP-themed room right now, and I do plan to post pictures, but the area’s conversion into dinosaur heaven isn’t fully complete yet. I can, however, show you my Jurassic Park Wall:


Here I thought I wouldn’t be doing a Random News segment for quite a while, but I guess I was wrong! I have some toy stuff to show you, but I feel that I must first acknowledge the beautiful human being that graced SDCC with his presence a little while ago:


He even got the sunglasses right! Bless you, good sir. And speaking of cosplay, there have been a few Claires popping up at conventions lately, but this is the first Lowery I’ve seen:


I don’t know who these people are, but props to both of them– especially to the Claire for doing her buttoned-up outfit from the beginning of the movie instead of her post-waterfall Ellie Sattler look (which is the one I’m going with because I’d feel terrible if I couldn’t get the right belt) and to the Lowery for somehow getting a perfectly accurate JW cup.

And, as Jurassiraptor pointed out, someone did the ultimate JP cosplay and it slipped right under our noses. Behold:


How could we have missed that for so long? Well, Barbasol boy, whether that was intentional or not (and I get the feeling it was), thank you for your service to this fandom. There were lots of guys running around in Hammond-esque Panama hats and white linen shirts, but this was a totally original and awesome throwback. Kudos.

As you may have guessed from the title, there’s been not a ton, but a little bit of new merchandise photos. Out of the next few pieces of merchandise, this is the one that you’ll be able to get your hands on the most easily. Credit goes to Jurassiraptor on Twitter for all of them:


Fellow Raptor Squad worshippers, rejoice! The girls are all getting re-released as Growlers! Just like the first Raptor Squad figures that you can find in stores right now (I’ve seen them all over the past couple of weeks and all I can say is ugh), Echo looks the best, while Charlie and Delta get the short end of the stick. Echo and Blue have the same mold while Charlie and Delta get a slight variation on that mold. The absolute best part, though, is that they’ve gotten their sickle claws back! Hooray, they’re functional raptors again! They appear to have had pigment-enhancing surgery (Echo’s fully Day-Glo) but at least they have the one defining feature that makes a raptor a raptor. So if you want a full Raptor Squad collection but feel squeamish with the ones we have at the moment, it might be in your best interest to wait a couple of months for these guys. Personally, I’ll probably snag a Delta when the time comes. Her and Blue’s colors seem the most screen-accurate.

By the way, if you want a cheap Echo toy and don’t care too much about size, I realized lately that this little guy looks almost exactly like a scaled-down version of the Echo toys out now:


She seems to have come from a 2013 Dino Battlers set, and considering how tiny she is, she shouldn’t be too expensive. I couldn’t find anyone selling her exact color scheme, but I’m sure a dedicated Echo fan could track it down on Ebay.


That’s a carnival game booth at the JP section of Islands of Adventure, and those are the official T. rex and I. rex plushies waiting to be won. There are others, such as Blue, but they look… well, derpy:



It seems that the only way to get the little cuties at the moment is in an arcade or high-end carnival, and I’m not sure that that’ll change anytime in the near future. In other words, you might want to practice your dart-throwing and/or water-shooting.


If you’ve been near any kid at all since last Christmas, you know that everybody who likes dinosaurs wants a Zoomer. Well, now we can share in that thirst with an official robotic I. rex. It’ll cost you some serious dough– WalMart is selling them for $120 right now– but just look at it. That has got to be the most adorable representation of a genetically-modified killing machine that I’ve ever seen in my life. I bet it wags its tail and tilts its little head and everything; the commercial should say, “Play with the I. Rex for hours and hours of fun! She wags, zooms and bites for an awesome playtime! You’ll have tons of fun with the Indominus and your other toys as she hunts them down and tears them limb from limb. BARBIE WILL SUFFER THE WORST DEATH IMAGINABLE.” So in case you hadn’t noticed, I really, really want one. And not just to pet its head and let it play with a little dog ball and pretend I’m raising a baby Indominus in inGen’s labs or anything… actually, wait. Yeah, that’s exactly why I want one.


Sadly enough, this is a mockup by Jurassiraptor and isn’t actually a real thing. I wish it was, though.


Finally in the way of barely available toys, this neat little 3-piece figure set is only available at Universal Studios parks, or on Ebay if you’re willing to shill out $45 for them. I think they’re adorable, albeit looking like the cup toppers that came with kids’ meals when Walking With Dinosaurs was in theaters. The paint jobs aren’t the best things in the world, but at last now we have fairly nice T. and I. rex figures that are on the same scale. They seem like a nice purchase for any JW fan, especially one who wants a Blue figure that has an actual blue stripe.



Okay, I lied when I said those raptor Growlers were the most easily attainable merchandise here. This is a JW pencil case that I found at WalMart, and at $2.50 I couldn’t afford not to get it. I’m excited to use it because I’ll have the most fiercely-guarded pencils in the whole state, and my newest little dinos like it because it makes a good cave in which to lurk/ nest.


Those guys are from a 3-dinosaur blindbag set, and they’re considerably smaller and more vulnerable than my other dinos. The others seem to be getting along well with them, though, especially Malcolm:


They even joined a new and improved Not-Entirely-Raptor Squad, working with Ian on his quest to “show that Pratt guy his place in the world”:



And a family even took Baby Pachycephalosaurus in! They had to escape from the Pachycephalosaurus Arena before they could go out and do anything fun, which was a bit difficult but not impossible (all they had to do was butt heads to short-circuit their tracking implants, and then hire a trusted carnivore friend to quietly take care of the ACUs):


The first thing the two pachys did with their new baby was take a family photo:


After that, they went out and saw the world as a family. They splurged a bit and took a trip to Italy:


They visited a pachy friend’s beach cabana on Isla Sorna:


They even went on a camping trip to celebrate Baby’s first birthday (pachy years are considerably shorter than human years, almost absurdly so)


And when they had seen the world and grown weary of travel, they decided to settle down. They immediately found an ideal home and began living their lives as a happy little family, in a housing development and supportive community filled with all kinds of other racist dinosaurs.


That’s all for now. Now that I have functional Internet back, I’ll likely be able to continue my Lego JW review soon!


3 thoughts on “Random News: Shining and Unattainable Merchandise Edition

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